Some are lucky enough to find true love so breathtaking that it is more than able to disable a person when it is crushed. The psycological pain that felt at that stage is so overwhelming that it can also be directed into physical pain. And in total set a part of a persons life on pause.
When I met my true love I could feel it in my body straight away. At the moment I saw her my body gave me signals and feelings that had never before been felt. When we first talked it was like I was completed and I knew she was the right one for me. Every day with her was cherished and I got no signals that it was about to end a couple of years later. By forces that we could not control.
From it ended almost two years ago I have not been able to get peace in my soul. I am on a constant move from nothing and to nothing. And every time I met a nice girl my body either made me avoid her or push her away.
Advices from people around me has always been to just move on. Find the next fish in the ocean. It is hard to do so when your brain like the idea, while your heart is just not able to let the right one go just yet.
Below is some songs that I often have listened to when I am feeling blue. Probably not the right kind of music at those times, but I feel they have helped. And lately I feel I have been more able to come to terms with my ended relationship with the right one. That there might be two rights ones for every person out there, and that my heart is ready to let the first one go in search for the second.
The first song is named “I don’t like to sleep alone” by Paul Anka. The song is a bit overproduced, as a lot of Paul Anka songs are, but it got great lyrics if you listen to the words.
I don’t like to sleep alone
Stay with me, don’t go
Talk with me for just a while
So much of you to get to know
Reaching out, touching you
Leaving all the worries all behind
Loving you, the way I do
My mouth on yours and yours on mine.
The second song is in my view one of the best from Dire Straits. It is named “Romeo And Juliet”. The lyrics is almost like a beautiful poem and is well worth listening to. I really like the original version, but I love the cover version made by The Killers. It has a little bit cleaner sound and the lyrics are sung with such feelings.
Juliet when we made love you used to cry
You said I love you like the stars above I’ll love you till I die
There’s a place for us you know the movie song
When you gonna realise it was just that the time was wrong juliet?
The third song is from Air Supply and has the title “All out of love”. I guess a lot of people have heard it and used it to comfort themself in their teens.
I want you to come back and carry me home
Away from this long lonely nights
I’m reaching for you, are you feeling it too
Does the feeling seem oh so right
And what would you say if I called on you now
And said that I can’t hold on
There’s no easy way, it gets harder each day
Please love me or I’ll be gone, I’ll be gone
My first true love, thank you for showing me that I was able to love someone as much as I love you. A small piece of my heart will always contain the love that is there for you, but I have to move on and hopefully my second true love will come my way.
(This post were written in December 2007 on my old blog, and moved here later)